personal

What’s Weirder: Dating Someone You’ve Never Met, Or Someone You Know Well?

I’ve been thinking about the question of how you meet people a lot lately.

Half of the people I’ve dated I’ve known for awhile before we started dating, whether that be through work, or school, or hobbies. The other half are people I met off-chance and hit it off with. In both cases, it felt more like I knew that person in some capacity before we started dating, because we didn’t meet and the intention wasn’t immediately the possibility of a relationship of some sort (or was it?). Now that I’ve been frequenting the Tinder, I’m curious about how you date someone you’ve never met before? We’ve covered topics like: do I really want to be dating? And how am I going to know if I like them romantically?  But we’ve never covered the ‘how do you even get to know someone from a strictly dating perspective?’

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Why Do We Think So Much About People Who Don’t Care About Us?

Alternate Title: Be Still My Foolish Heart? (Anything to drag Hozier into my chats) 

I’m not talking about unrequited love, I’m talking about how we create crushes on people we don’t *really* have an actual interest in. You might think you don’t do this, but I promise you know someone who does. People far and wide that I’ve talked to do this thing where we fixate on someone we know we can’t have. We harbour these little (or big) crushes on people who are long since gone. Maybe they live in another city, maybe they’re in a relationship. Regardless, we’re only interested because they’re off limits. So why do we think so much about people don’t care?

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Am I Leading Someone On When I’m Getting to Know Them?

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Picking up where we left off with “Am I Self-Sabotaging Romance?” I am now anxious about how one actually dates people without leading them on, or letting them down. Am I leading someone on when I’m getting to know them? What if I decide I don’t like them *like that*? (Simple answer is that these are natural side effects of dating, no?) All throughout our childhood and adolescence we spend time worrying about whether or not other people like us. Now, not only am I still convinced that everyone else thinks I am The Most Annoying Person Ever, but I’ve also developed anxiety about whether or not *I* like other people. Will it never end?!

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Am I Self-Sabotaging Romance?

Processed with VSCO with kp2 presetAm I self-sabotaging romance? For a very long time I was fully honest and confident that the answer to this question was yes. When I was twenty-one and finally had coverage for the braces I was supposed to get when I was 14, I got them because “then no one will want to kiss me, so I definitely won’t fall in love with anyone. A year from now I will be free to move overseas with nothing holding me back.” It technically worked, but I feel like I’ve been self-sabotaging a LOT longer. I always, always, ALWAYS went to formal events with my girl friends in high school. And, self professed that I would never want to go with any of the guys (bi me just coming out to play, or me just trying to avoid the disappointment of no one asking?). Even when I did date in university, I always keep people at an arms length. I was convinced I wasn’t in the right place to have that committed kind of relationship. So I was always self-sabotaging romance, but it wasn’t always intentional….

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19 Things To Do In 2019

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A classic ’19 things to do in 2019 list’! Ahhh, it wouldn’t be a new year without a good old bucket list! I’m very nosey so I loooove reading people’s bucket lists, but this year I thought I would adapt mine to be less all about me so that it’s a bit more accessible to readers. So this is my list of 19 things to do in 2019, that maybe you will also like to try this year!…

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2018: A Year In Review

2018 was a big one for me. I graduated, moved out of my family home, travelled a ton, started new jobs, and met a bunch of new people. Looking back, I can see myself a year ago as someone who had no idea what the future held. This year has changed everything about me, from the hair on my head the very essence of my outlook on life. Here’s my year in review. What happened, maybe after reading you’ll be able to understand why I’ve become such a different person in such a short period of time.
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